In chatting with a…what do I call someone I’ve been messaging with, haven’t met yet, but would like to see naked? Is that a friend? Acquaintance? I think there needs to be a new category for this.
Anyway, during a recent conversation, the term mid-life crisis was called into question. This friend/acquaintance/like to get naked with person suggested that rather than some kind of railing against aging, perhaps it’s just the desire to pursue whatever calls me because, in her words, why the hell not?
Our conversation got me to thinking a bit about the timing of this change in my attitude. You see, not only am I sneaking up on fifty like an elephant wearing enormous tap shoes and one of those jingly belly dancer’s belts, but I am also single for the first time in almost forever, and my children are pretty much grown. That means the pressure to support an entire family has lifted (if not the financial burden). I can now make decisions based solely on my own desires. I can walk around my house naked, drink out of the milk jug, and masturbate in the kitchen should I so desire (y’all really want me to invite you to dinner now, don’t ya!?).
The first dip of my toe into the world of freedom of choice/mid-life crisis came in the
form of live music. I am a musician (okay, okay…I’m a drummer. You can decide if that qualifies as a musician or not), and I love music. Some of you will make fun of me for it, in which case…fuck you…but I have been a metalhead for a very long time. I blame my brother for it as, when I was seven or eight years old and just beginning to appreciate music, he was listening to KISS and Queen. Truthfully, he was also listening to the Partridge Family and Sean Cassidy, but even then I knew better than to let that crap stick.
In the last couple of years, I have made it a goal to see all the bands I always wanted to see but couldn’t for one reason or another. To really understand this undertaking, you need to know that I live in Victoria, BC, on Vancouver Island. To get here requires a ferry trip from the mainland that most bands don’t really like to take. As a result, if I’m to see these bands, it requires a trip to Vancouver and a stay overnight. That grossly over-priced $150 concert ticket suddenly becomes a $150 trip there and back and $200 hotel or Air BnB for the night. $500 per concert, thank you very much.
It’s gotta be done, though. We’re talking about bands from when I was a kid. How any of them are still alive and able to make music is a marvel in and of itself. My list of concerts over the last year and a half or so includes Tool, Metallica (with Avenged Sevenfold and Gojira–if you like your music aggressive and impressive, make sure you see Gojira), Alice Cooper, Alice in Chains (slept on that one and missed Layne Staley by 16 years), Peter Frampton, and the Steve Miller Band. Next up is KISS in January. For good measure, I’ve also taken in Postmodern Jukebox (just to show my tastes have expanded as my years have) and the Queen tribute It’s A Kind of Magic, but both those shows actually made their way the full journey to our island-bound paradise.
Oh, and there will be more concerts…Iron Maiden is back in September of 2019, as well as Elton John doing what is supposed to be his final tour the same month (again…how is that man still alive?). I always keep my eye open for concert news.
As I age, I’ve realized that experiences are more important than things. For my son’s last birthday, I told him I wanted us to find something to do together rather than buying him a present, so he decided we should go skydiving. I have to admit I’ve been dragging my feet a little bit on that one…feeling a little nervous. I’ve ben bungee jumping, which I loved, but it seems to me with skydiving, should something go wrong, you sure have a lot more time to contemplate that ground rushing up to meet you. If anyone has encouraging words to pass along regarding the concept of jumping out of a plane that is not on fire and crashing, please feel free to pass them along.
For my birthday, I want to take my children to California and ride as many rollercoasters
as humanly possible.
But this so-called mid-life crisis of mine is so much more than seeking experiences, it really is about a complete change of mindset in so many ways. So of them are natural progression, some of them are about the fight against feeling older, some are about maintaining balance in the face of so many life changes happening all at once, and not everything is positive, but we’ll mostly stick with the fun stuff. 😉
Keep your eyes open for the next post in this series: Mid-Life Crisis Part Deux: The Danger Zone.
(PS – for anyone interested…met her, didn’t get naked, probably won’t see each other again. The not naked and not seeing again are not in any way related).